1. Free access to campus gym
Eating fresh isn't enough to keep Dr. Conn trim.
2. Rich Devos is still alive
Paul Conn to inherit large scissors and ribbon if he is still president.
3. Lee doesn’t own all of downtown Cleveland–yet
Craigmiles Hall to be renamed Devos Hall.
4. He’s waiting for a spot to open up in North Cleveland Towers
That rocking chair has been occupied since 1995.
5. Hammond isn’t ready to become president
The boy scouts mistakenly recruited Hammond last month.
6. His grandchildren haven’t attended Lee yet
Dr. Conn lecturing his white-clad grandchildren at Easter.
7. Sodexo food better than Darlia’s
Darlia is still in training at the international station.
8. He can’t retire until he appears to be 45 years old
Dr. Conn and family from recent photograph.
9. His closet is still full of Paul Conn bobble head dolls
At the current rate, Dr. Conn must distribute his stash at Ask the President Chapel for the next 11.7 years.
10. He still hasn’t lived up to dad’s expectations
"You're going to turn Lee University into the next Notre Dame!" - Charles W. Conn