Our First Clarion Interview

In the new issue of the Clarion, you will find an article which describes the formation and goals of the leek. That article was based on an interview we conducted with its author. It was not, however, our first correspondance with her. Earlier in the semester, the author e-mailed us a list of questions which we answered as truthfully as possible. We provide that interview here for your enjoyment. 


1. According to your website it looks like there are four people writing for the-leek: Georgia Eliot, Pelham

Longfellow, Publiusmane, and Fallonheller. Is this true or are all the pseudonyms for one person??


Well, you forgot Grover Shirpstache.


2. If you say that there are more than one person writing for this website, could each writer please respond separately to the following questions? When you answer them please identify yourself by your representative pseudonym so I know who to quote. 🙂 Thanks. 


Eh, no


3. Who had the idea to start this website?


As with all good ideas, The Leek was conceived inside of a woman.


4. How did you have the idea to start this? What was your inspiration? 


Ridiculous happenings about town.


5. Where do you get your story ideas from? Do you get them through personal connections or just hear-say? 


Edgar, the deep-voiced narrator in my head. –Fallon Heller


6. You write stories on a daily basis…how do you come up with so many ideas?


The process starts with thinking of the thing we want to be true, but never will. Then we write that. –Publius Mane


7. How much of what you write is factual and how much of it is false? Are a lot of the stories based off true events? 


How much of what The Clarion writes is really important?


8. You have quoted several faculty members, are any of these quotes real?


Every single one. Except all of them. –Pelham Longfellow


9. Was the break-up story true or were all the characters in the story completely made up?


Like most satire, the story is completely false but contains a lot of truth. -Publius


10. When was the first time you thought about starting/writing for a website such as the-leek? Please describe what you were thinking at the time.


Easy. I have too much time on my hands.” -Publius


“I dream of becoming a superstar millionaire reporter for The Onion.” -Georgia


“We could totally get laid if we start writing satire. Anonymously.” –Pelham


“Badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger…” –Fallon


11. What kind of feedback have you received from the students and faculty?


Everyone has been great.

“Love Lee U’s the Leek.” –McClung

“The Leek is hilarious.” –Harrison Keeley

“Best thing to hit Lee University yet.” Tumblr girl

“How could these people produce such consistently funny content so quickly?” @Curtalify

150 facebook likes in the first ten days.

More than 5,866 views in the first ten days.


12. Has the feedback you’ve received been what you hoped for? Please explain. 


Kinder than we could have ever hoped for. In all honesty, the Lee University community has been very welcoming to this experiment, well almost, but not all of it.

“You have deeper issues than a lack of self confidence if you leave a school because everything & everyone is ‘too pretty’”


13. How do you see the-leek influencing Lee University in the future? How do you hope the-leek will influence Lee in the future?


.Satire offers an excellent venue as a way to offer critiques of institutions without being offensive, in a humorous way.


14. What is the purpose of the-leek?


Clearly to provide underprivileged teens with a safe and fun place to hang out in the afternoons.


15. Since there have been secret blogs in the past that were shut down for offensive content by administration, do you ever worry that your website will get shut down by administration?




16. On the “About” section you say that this website is meant as a joke and for people to be entertained, not offended. How do you make sure you keep the balance of poking fun at things without being too offensive or mean? 


Mainly checks and balances, Charity. Checks and balances.


17. If I come up with more questions, would the best way to contact you still be via email?


These methods are preferable:

Smoke signals

A similarly elaborate fireworks display

Sidewalk chalk on the ped mall

A tattoo on Paul Conn’s forehead

The billboard on I-75


Pigeon to Lee Box 3901

The “Ask the President” box in the dining hall

A ReGroup mass email

The now-defunct pony express

Give a note to Wendi



But email will suffice


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